parenting Uncategorized

I’m NO Super Woman (Mom)

super mom

A friend of mine posted the above yesterday on her timeline and I asked permission to post on the blog.

This is an excellent question and most days I really have NO idea how I manage my life. What I do know is that I’m NO Super Woman (Mom).

The fact that Supermom is actually in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary defined as an exemplary mother; also :  a woman who performs the traditional duties of housekeeping and child-rearing while also having a full-time job; made me chuckle.

I work 9-6 (7 am-8 pm with commute) Monday – Thursday, I have been blessed with the ability to work from home on Friday’s, so why do I say I’m NO Super woman (mom)? Because I share the same life of many working (in home or out of home) moms (and dads) we just get it done.

There is nothing new or spectacular about what we are doing. Some of us made conscience decisions to be parents and for those who did not ‘choose’ once they discovered their life was going to change, they were all in. Parenting is the toughest job that has ever been created. There is no handbook, every single child is different and the truth is we get it wrong more often then we get it right.

Being the mother of three, a wife, working a full time job, handling a side gig, being an active participant in church, a daughter, sister to 8 and listening ear to friends who need me certainly is just a drop in the bucket of who MrsDeveter is but Lord knows I wouldn’t change my life one iota.

What I will say is that it’s important to me that I have a work/life balance.

Here is a list I wrote some time ago that I will be sure to revisit in 2016 to make sure I am living my best life.

1. Know when to say NO! This goes for work and home… you have to know when enough is too much! You have to be able to tell your boss “no I can’t stay late today but I can come in a little earlier tomorrow to finish this project .” No at home can happen when family members are asking you to do things that you just don’t want or have time to do. Saying no is big on my list and I think I’ve pretty much mastered it.

2. Realize your role. My friend and I always use the line “stay in your lane.” Sometimes it’s difficult at home and work to only do the things that you are responsible for. At home if your job is to take out the trash … take out the trash. Don’t sweep the floor, do the dishes and forget to take out the trash. You have to complete the work that is assigned to your hands. If you stay in your lane you won’t be exhausted at the end of the day. This goes for home and work. If your job is to make copies and hand them out… do just that… don’t read the copy and point out all the errors to the person who asked you to make the copies. That is their job…. STAY IN YOUR LANE!

3. Take a time out . This is really important to me. Even at work I take about 15 mins outside of my (unpaid) lunch to give myself a break. If you are a stay at home parent you need to do the same thing. When the other parent makes their appearance or when your little one finally takes a nap, you need to give yourself a time out! Spring is upon us, take a walk around the block, go to the gym , read a chapter in that novel you started six months ago; do something for YOU. Having time for yourself helps you  take a step back and look at things from a different perspective. It gives you balance.

4. Recognize you can’t do it all. Sometimes even the things that are assigned to you can be too much. Recognize that you are human and you can’t do it all and you certainly can’t be all things to all people. Realize and vocalize your limits and don’t feel bad about it.

5. Have fun. The best balance in work/life is enjoying whatever you do. Whether it is working or taking care of your family. Enjoy it and give it your all. Apply items 1-4 and then fun and you have a very good balance in your life. The scale won’t always be even but make sure that a portion of fun is always included.

Until next time…

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